Sex & Relationships: “JUST THE TIP” and other Lies Men Tell

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Sunday, September 11th, 2011


Every woman, no matter how smart she is has fallen for a lie at some point in her life but in my opinion the most ludicrous lie that most women have fallen for is the “baby, lemme just put the tip” lie. I will now proceed to narrate in verbatim, the response I got from one particular customer the day I threw this question on the table at my hair salon, but before you continue I must warn you that the rest of this article might be crude but you must not stop now, humor me; keep reading.

“I unashamedly admit that I too have fallen for this fib. I became sexually active quite early in life but I did not begin to understand the male specie until I was well into my twenties. When I was in my first year in university of Nigeria, Nsukka I met George, a 200 level engineering student. George was tall, dark and in all honesty a very average looking young man, but there was something about him that instantly made my heart aflutter. We hung out a couple of times and then one day he invited me over to his house. I eagerly agreed because I figured this would encourage him to pop the “will you be my girlfriend question” I had been dying to hear him ask.

At first, George was the perfect host, we made small talk and watched some TV, after a few hours of watching several movies he went into killer mode, he muted the TV and turned on the CD player. Within seconds we were making out to Joe’s ‘wanna be your lover’, which happened to be one of my favorite songs ever, and before I knew it we were both naked on his tiny mattress. As George slowly guided his penis to my vagina I stiffened, I was suddenly afraid, I didn’t know if I was ready to be intimate with him when I wasn’t sure where our relationship was headed. Noticing my hesitation he whispered in my ear, his breath was hot on my cheeks as he said,

“Baby you know I’m crazy about you, I don’t want to rush you, I just want to feel you a little; let me just put the tip and play around your p***y, I promise I won’t go in”.

I naively acquiesced, thinking “what harm could there be in that”.

Suffice it to say that not only did George put the tip; he went in and rode me like a mare. I left his house that day in tears of anger and shame; he never called me after that incident.
That was the end of us”.

As I grew older and made lots of female friends I realized that just like the strange woman whose story I have just narrated, a lot of other women have fallen for this “just the tip” line, myself included. But as painful as it was when I was younger, it is now easy for me to laugh about it; it is even funnier when it happens to me now. I recently met this highly eligible bachelor at a social event in Lagos, after months of wining and dining me, we found ourselves alone in his apartment one rainy Friday night, one thing led to another and before I knew it we were both half-naked in his bed, I was going to give ‘it’ up to him but he must have misread my intentions because just as he was about to penetrate me he whispered,
“Baby don’t worry I will just put the tip and play around for a bit”.

I pushed him off of me and laughed so hard his erection instantly shriveled like a prune, I left his house that day amused and relieved, no good would definitely have come out of being with a guy that still has to use the “just the tip” line to get laid.

Men tell other less amusing lies, for example: he tells you he will never love another woman the way he loves you, he tells you he is working late when he is rendezvousing with another woman, he tells you he is not ready to be in a relationship when what he really means is “I just want to sleep with you not date you”, you catch him with another woman and he says “baby I swear she won’t let me be, she’s stalking me” and on and on the list goes, its endless.

But I will say this before I go, do not make the mistake of hasty generalization, just because a lot of men have lied to you doesn’t mean all men lie, there are still a few good men out there, but in the meantime it pays to be on your guard, learn to detect the lies men tell and save yourself a lot of tears and heartache.

Image Credit: Paul Cadmus.

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